If you are just coming out of a painful breakup of a perfect relationship, it is clear that it wasn't so perfect after all.!
One of the first pitfalls to look out for, is premature reconciliation.You need to keep your emotions under control! I know this can be a tall order, but if you want success in your relationship, you have to do it.
First of all, do not bombard your ex with attempts to make contact. This will only cause more harm! Take time to calm down. Find activities to keep your mind occupied. Go out with friends, learn a new hobby, go to gym..... there are so many things you can do. This will enable you to clear your mind, and when you can think straight again, you might see the situation in a whole new perspective!
Even if your ex makes contact with you first, if your emotions are not under control, it is dangerous! Try to avoid contact. Rather let them leave a message.
Once you are in control of yourself, and feel ready to make contact, you still need to be cautious. Keep your conversation short, but friendly. Maybe have a cup of coffee together, but limit it to 20 - 30 minutes. It is easy to fall in the trap of just thinking you can pick up where left off.
With the first sign of your ex indicating that he/she is willing to pick up the pieces, it is so easy to get all emotional about it! You don't want to resist. You think everything is a okay!! You only think about getting your ex back!
Wrong!!! Remember why you broke up in the first place! Communicate! You need to talk about it. Stay calm, and rather make a suggestion such as:.."Let us take it slow, and see where it leads us to..." You need to go through a process. Discuss what happened and start building the relationship from scratch. Talk about things that irritated both of you. You cannot fix a problem, unless you discover the cause. Jumping back into an emotional relationship, getting intimate to soon, is not going to solve the problem. You just might end up not hearing from your ex again!
Stay in control. This will leave a much better impression as well. You are not on some wild emotional "roller coaster ride". Hey, we all admire strong people. People with self control. Show that you are serious about the relationship, and you want to make it work.
I know all this is much easier said than done, which is why I am not going to leave you in the middle of no where. You need help from an expert. Visit the link below, and get the help you need. I promise, you will not regret it!
Your relationship doesn't have to be over. Practical advice to save your relationship.
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